There’s a part of the internet that can be definitely best described as interesting. I, of course, use the term interesting very loosely. But it has to be said when the part of the internet that I am referring to is best described in the words of Family Guy’s very own Peter Griffin: “The book can also be [heightens his voice] a hat.”
Yep, there’s a dedicated place for chaotic hats, and the internet is better off because of it.
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If you thought hats are just too damned boring, think again. Hats have great potential for chaos. Or, I guess, the general predicament that particular hats and other hat-like cranial accessories find themselves in have great potential.
The Instagram page very appropriately titled @chaotichats encompasses this very niche phenomenon without fault.
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The Instagram page was created back in May of 2023, and has since then amassed a modest, yet still relevant following of nearly 8,400 people.
The page is affiliated with another popular Instagram page in pretty much the same chaotic way called Chaotic Shirts (@chaoticshirts). It also has merch, so there’s that.
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The page features pretty much what you’d expect. Or wouldn’t, actually.
Folks, animals and inanimate objects wearing hats in some aptitude or capacity. But it’s of the chaotic variety, whereby it’s not always a hat, or the hat sends a very oof message, or it’s a fashion statement like no other.
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And this all circles back to what Peter Griffin said: a book can also be a hat.
Heck, anything can honestly be a hat. As long as it serves the function of a hat: it is a piece of headwear that serves to protect people from various weather conditions, fulfills ceremonial or religious purposes, or is worn as an accessory of fashion or social status.
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Now, if you’re not a hat person, you can at least understand why folks do it and appreciate them for what they are.
Folks wear hats for many reasons, but according to Bon Clic Bon Genre, a French millinery (fancy word for hat maker), it’s more than just a fashion statement.
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Some people wear hats to gain confidence. After all, looking good makes you feel good too, and if you have, say, a complex over your face, hats help manage the shape in ways that would make you feel more comfortable with yourself.
This in turn leads to the idea of hats affirming your identity. Clothes are a statement in and of itself, so if you wear a cowboy hat, it says something about you.
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Hats also provide room for breaking dress codes and balancing outfits to fit your style and preference.
There are certain getups that feel like everyone’s done it, but putting a traveling hat, or a trilby or even a linen cap might add an accent to put you in the spotlight on the streets.
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If anything, hats are just handy to have around. Need one as an accent to what you’re already wearing? Check. Need to hide your shame of having one too many yesterday? Check. Don’t want to be noticed while you take out your trash in the least amount of effort in terms of style? Check. There’s more, but you get the point.
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Heck, even animals are doing it. No, let’s one-up this. There’s another online community that’s all about hats on snakes. And while chaos isn’t in its middle name, it definitely sends a message about the otherwise treacherous danger noodles—and that having a hat on has the power of making you look so adorable that you will forget all your social anxiety and self-preservation instincts.
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Now, if you’re still not up for putting on a hat, no biggy, you can still enjoy them on snakes… right?
Well, if you can’t enjoy that either, then mayhaps leave a comment explaining your stance on hats?
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