77 Baby Names That Immediately Make People Lose All Respect For The Parents

A person's name is a huge part of their identity. It's what our teachers call us in class, what our partners moan in bed, and, ultimately, what our tombstone will say.

But sometimes it not only describes those who wear it but the ones that came up with it as well, and can say a lot about their creativity. Or the lack of it.

There's a post on Reddit by user Frasepalm that asks the question, "What baby name immediately makes you lose all respect for the parents and why?" As of this article, it has over 13,000 comments, many of which suggest that not everyone should be allowed to fill out their child's birth certificate.

#1

Back when I worked with children, I met a young lass named Younique. I felt sorry for her. She was only 4-5 at the time, and the moment she entered school, she began to hate it because the other children thought that it was silly and wouldn’t play with her. Eventually, the dad of another child said that it was a bad name *to her face.* Seriously. Don’t do things like this to your children. They aren’t pets. They’ll have to deal with the repercussions of your bad naming choices.

Image credits: Sebaren

#2

One little girl got her name legally changed in court, because her parents named her Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii.

Image credits: Tiny_Parfait

#3

Abcde (pronounced Ab-city).

Image credits: anon

#4

Any name based on a popular TV series or movie. Like, if I see your daughter is named Khaleesi, I think significantly less of you as a person.

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#5

I was once checking in a customer for service.

EmoChanel

And she was very proud of it.

Image credits: Hysteria878

#6

Not so much a specific name, but gross butcherings of names. Ie. Kaightlynne instead of Caitlyn.

Image credits: Violetlemonbug

#7

So my Wife was giving birth to our first Son and the midwife asked if we’d chosen a name yet. We said yes and told her ‘Seth’. She replied “Oh thank goodness, a normal name! The last woman in here named her child Precious Bunny!”

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#8

Ohnasti

Supposedly pronounced “Honesty” but all I’ll ever see is “Oh Nasty!”

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#9

I was on a little league baseball team with these two brothers named Doer and Achiever.

Talk about pressure to perform, those parents had expectations.

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#10

Renesmee

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#11

A co-worker has a friend who named her daughters Vengeance and Violence.

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#12

I used to write on cakes, the worst name I ever saw was "Tuba Poo". I asked if it was a nickname, it was not. It's been like 6 years and it still haunts me. Her mother's name was Natalie, why Natalie? Why?

Image credits: jackiekackie

#13

The overly matchy names to the point of ridiculousness. My top example is a set of brothers named Romance, Romantic, and Romeo.

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#14

Someone I know is a nurse in the ER so they've delivered quite a few babies. But one day they said that one set of parents decided to name their kid Ssss. You pronounce Ssss, Forest.

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#15

Baby. As in the Dirty Dancing lead female. Because nobody in the professional world is going to want their name to be Baby.

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#16

My cousin named her son named Lincoln, which isn't bad by itself.

At least until she had her daughter, Kennedy. She said she plans on naming her next kid Garfield.

She literally names her kids after the last names of *assassinated presidents.*

#17

Kash. It isn't the worst name in the world but the fact his second name was 'Ransom', made it a whole lot worse.

Kash Ransom.

Image credits: DrPrankz

#18

There was a girl in my sister’s class called Morshe. Her mother wanted to name her Maryam and her dad wanted to name her Porsche (which in of itself is an awful name). They decided to mash up Maryam and Porsche and call her Morshe.

#19

Saw a fun name on the attendance sheet (so this is official) of one of my classes: Daddyboi

Image credits: Cocoleia

#20

MyLuv (yes, I have met a kid named this). That poor kid is probably not going to be successful, unless they change their name later on.

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#21

Chicago, North, True. Just to name a few. I’m no Kardashian hater, but I really can’t stand the names they give their kids.

#22

I had a set of twins (I'm a teacher) a couple years ago named Heaven and Nevaeh.

I had four kids named Shaun in one class, all spelled differently, none spelled Shaun or Sean.

I had a girl named Jezebel and boys named Jesus and Messiah in one class. (Nothing really wrong with those names, but having all three in one class was odd.) I also had a kid named Ted that year. Not Theodore or Edward, just Ted. I saw his birth certificate, just Ted.

This year, one of the other teachers has a boy named M'Lord. I'm not even making that.

What's getting my goat this year is the random apostrophes. Your child's name is Elayna, a lovely name, IMO, but E'lay'na is ridiculous. I have three girls with random apostrophes in their names, its annoying.

#23

I went to high school with a one "Crystal Shanda Lear."

This was back before dumb names were the rage. She would have been named that in, say, 81-82. Poor girl. I don't know that I lost respect for the parents so much as felt bad for her to be saddled with that s**t.

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#24

I met the adult child of parents who named their daughter Morticia Addams, after the TV Show. I made her show me her driver's license and there was the proof. Her own parents had a different last name.

#25

I had a chemistry teacher who was an avid runner. He proudly told us his three children were named Miles, Lane, and Chase. How narcissistic do you have to be to name your children after your hobby?

#26

Strap in and prepare for rough seas!

My mom is a midwife and one day she came home with what she thought was the epitome of dumb names.

These parents had just gotten back from a trip to the states, where they had visited a dock to look at boats, and one of those beautiful boats had an even more beautiful and exotic name, they wanted to name their baby daughter after this boat.

Usnavy

My mom is a saint for not laughing.

Image credits: Maar7en

#27

Felony Meth.

#28

One of my former employees had the first name “Baby Destiny.” Yes. Really.

Worse still, HR just put “Baby” on her name badge. For every time I had to catch myself and say the full name so I didn’t sound like a creep, I can only imagine how many other people didn’t realize there were two words in her name and had to refer to her as just Baby. Or how she must have felt to have EVERYONE calling her Baby.

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#29

Anaesthasia. No s**t. Her name on her school documents was Anaesthasia.

Image credits: Pleasedmangoes689

#30

Royalty. Legit worked with this hood dude named royalty. I think it kinda speaks for itself.

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#31

Knew a family with Hunter, Fisher, and Ryder.

#32

Tequila, but pronounced tuh-quill-uh

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#33

I’ve taught:
- Precious
- Princess
- Righteousness
- Blessing
- Pious
- Destiny
*edit* forgot Sincere

#34

I lose respect for parents who give their kids first names that when added to their given last names become horrible. The parents don't even care that their kid has to live with it. Two real examples I've come across are Richard Sieman (The guy's name is D**k Semen, for f***s sake.) And even worse, Desire Cox.

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#35

Naming your child Bear makes me think you’re a huge twat. Mostly because I’ve met a few gorgeous children called Bear and everyone of the parents were huge twats.

#36

There is a kid at my school literally named Shadow Black.

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#37

You know the Duggar family (19 Kids and Counting)? One of their daughters named their son Spurgeon. SPURGEON.

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#38

Names with uneccessary letters or the rarely-seen, lack of necessary letters:

Jaiymes

Jaxn

Khaydence

Aayden

#39

I know some twins named Jeffrey and Jeffroy and it's just lazy.

#40

I knew three sisters names -Autumn-Breeze, Summer-Skye and April-Rain.

Bonus addition one of them had a kid and named it Gidget.

Edit for those wondering: This is in Eastern Canada.

Image credits: djbadname13

#41

One time when I was working at a motel, I took a reservation over the phone from a woman for her daughter:

Woman: Her name is Sri Lanka, S R I space L A N K A...

Me: Oh, you mean like the country!

Woman: Whaddaya mean, country?!?

Image credits: DarthGandhi

#42

Prancer and Vixen for babies born during the Christmas season.

Image credits: Back2Bach

#43

Destiny Love. That little girl is doomed.

#44

I once worked for Build-a-Bear Workshop. In one of their new hire training videos there was an employee taking to the camera about who the f**k knows because all I could focus on was her name tag. It said "Om'unique". Like, I'm Unique, except worse. I still have no idea what she was taking about.

#45

A few years ago there was a guy in my area in the news. His first name was Justice. He's doing 100 years for stabbing 3 people.

#46

Name that has degrading meaning. I mean how stupid are you to call your son Loser. Yes, I am implying the Winner Lane and Loser Lane guy.

#47

There was this neo-nazi couple that named one of their children after Adolf Hitler.

#48

Chardonnay

#49

KVIIIlyn

#50

Nevaeh, although I think that has more to do with the fact that every parent I know who has named their baby this is a teenager who thinks they’re “soooo cool” for dropping out of school in 9th grade, who are about as deep as a puddle but think they’re Aristotle or Shakespeare because “it’s heaven spelled backwards since she’s my angel”

#51

Twins named Javier and Xavier. Just why.

#52

Fathers who name their boy Sue.

#53

I had a teacher in grade 1/2 whose last name was Dyck (sounds like d**k). Fortunately at that age I didn't think anything of it. Apparently her parents didn't think anything of it either...

Her parents named her Rhoda. Rhoda Dyck. I have to assume they were sadistic assholes.

#54

A girl at my high school named her child Tuff Danger so dumb names like that make me lose respect for someone.

#55

There was a lady at the library the other day corralling her two kids, Bailey and Jameson. Either one is fine, but together...

#56

Where the first and last name are the same, or derivative. John Johnson, David Davidson, etc.

#57

Hingle McCringleberry

#58

Any form of Aiden (Aidin, Ayden, Aidyn, Ayeden) and/or Ashley (Ashlee, Ashleigh, Ashlie, Ashli, Ash-Lee).

I am a teacher and have had students with all those variations. I actually had 3 Aidens and 4 Ashleys (none of which were spelled normally) in a class of 23 students.

Like come on parents, you aren't being original by making your kid's name ridiculous to spell.

#59

I know of someone who is called Star, which is kinda cute except for the fact she’s named that because it’s rats spelled backwards, she was born in the year of the rat...

#60

I found out a long while after we broke up that my ex had named a kid 'Zebedee'. I think that counts as child abuse.

#61

Im going to chip in with my own: Anyone who decides its okay to name their child after something you'd find in a fruit bowl.

#62

Niquilla and Dayquilla. Twins.

#63

I went to school with a guy named Coors.

#64

Any “creative” spelling of a normal name. Like spelling:

Zoe-Zoi

Charles-Sharlz (yes I know one)

And so on

#65

My mom works at an elementary school. There is a kid there whose name is Braxton Hycke. The poor kid.

#66

A kid in my daughter’s class is named Trotter.

Neigh...

#67

Heaven Leigh

Seriously?

#68

Shaylynne, Laykyn, McKynleigh

Brayden, Hayden, Jayden

All of these kids attend the library programs my kid does. *Edit Laykyn and McKynleigh are twins. And no they’re not Irish. Not even the Irish go that bananas (I’m irish).

And, even though I love the old names, if you named your baby Atticus in 2018 you’re probably the world’s most annoying hipster.

#69

A few weeks ago when I was at the gym, I looked up at the tv while I was running and there was a news report on about a missing child named Khaleesi, except it was spelled Cahleeseigh or Chalysee or something stupid like that. Bad enough that it's a title, not a name. Even worse that it's not even traditionally a position of power in the asoiaf universe--it's more "wife of leader" than "queen", as it is often thought of as. But the misspelling just make it so, so much worse. Hasn't that poor child been through enough? (I think the kid was found safe btw.)

#70

My older brother named his son "Morty", after the titular character of Rick and Morty. I have nothing against the show or anyone who watches it, but... C'mon, man.

#71

Two kids at an office in LA many years ago... Axyl and Gunner.

#72

I have a nephew named Anfernee, and I know how mad he gets when I call him Anthony. Almost as mad as I get when I think about the fact that my sister named him Anfernee.

#73

I used to tutor and the Green family had their children getting tutored. Kids names: Kelly, Hunter, Sage and Forrest.

#74

My sister-in-law named her kid after the land of Canaan (biblical reference). For those not in the know, it's pronounced "cay-nin", or "cay-nun". She decided to pronounce it "cannon" ("Canon").


Not only is she one of the least Christian people I have ever met (who adamantly says she follows the Bible), she also consciously chose a well-known name and purposely mispronounced it for her kid's name.


Edit: my wife just reminded me that not only did her sister do the above, she also chose to spell his name "Kanann".

#75

Names like Moon, Hope, Star, Flower... I knew someone who's children are Star, Moon and Sky. Ugh.

#76

Brandy, Crystal or anything else that suggests your baby is named after your drug of choice.

#77

If your native language is Spanish any name of English origin (Steven, John, Bryan, Kevin, Etc), they are often associated with criminals.

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